Comments on: Just because I’m curious

By: Marguerite

Marguerite — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 17:06:37 +0000

BrianE: Wow! Great points.

By: BrianE

BrianE — Mon, 30 Jun 2008 15:04:17 +0000

If you have the ability to read auras, sure. Then you’d just have to determine whether you had a compatible aura.
For the rest of us, I offer the words of Don Francisco– “Love is not a feeling, it’s an act of the will.”
And if loving someone is sometimes hard, I’d be careful to choose someone that I didn’t mind working hard to love.

By: Ymarsakar

Ymarsakar — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 23:59:00 +0000

Cass has a funny test up.

http://www.villainouscompany.com/vcblog/archives/2008/06/ha_2.html

By: Ellie2

Ellie2 — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 23:30:32 +0000

I agree with Marguerite that the pop culture idea of “soul-mates” has done much damage to Marriage as an institution by raising unrealistic expectations.

In my parents’ days, marriage was regarded as a partnership, a social and an economic necessity. A business deal, if you will.

Love, soul-mates, etc had nothing to do with it.

Yet even then, Love sometimes overtook all. cf Victoria & Albert.

By: Danny Lemieux

Danny Lemieux — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 23:01:46 +0000

Yup! When I first saw my wife, I somehow knew I was going to marry her, even if I didn’t know who she was. There was a “je ne sais quois” about her that just clicked with me. Even now, I suspect that we communicate telepathically.

I see the same thing happening with my son and a girl he just “clicked” with three years ago as a young teen. They just seem to be growing together.

By: benning

benning — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 20:26:36 +0000

No.

Attraction at first sight, lust at first sight, but not love. True love takes a little time to grow.

By: Marguerite

Marguerite — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 18:54:20 +0000

My comment is late in the game . . . I lean toward ‘no’ on love at first sight, definitely strong attraction, but not the love that sustains a marriage through thick and thin. But along w/that theme, I think one of the worst ideas being heavily sold today is ’soulmates’. This sets up ridiculous and undeliverable expectations down the line, but many are buying into this, including dating agencies.

By: David Foster

David Foster — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 14:45:08 +0000

“First sight” should be distinguished from “first meeting.” You can tell a lot more about somebody by talking with them at a distance of 3 feet than seeing them across a room at a distance of 15 feet.

For some people, the sound of an individual’s voice–as well as what they say–probably matters almost as much as physical appearance.

Below the conscious level, smell may also have a big impact. I’ve read that women, particularly, subconsciously use smells to detect whether a prospective mate has a compatible immune system…also, that birth control pills can alter the way this works.

So if the above is actually true, an initial strong attraction might become less-strong if she later starts or stops taking the pill…

By: Don Quixote

Don Quixote — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 14:11:58 +0000

Absolutely!

By: Al

Al — Fri, 27 Jun 2008 10:55:32 +0000

While I suppose most couples do not, some do fall in love at first sight. And each member of the couple does not have to realize it at the same time. A story in our family reflects that. My father’s parents grew up next door to each other. There was the usual sharing of each other’s things, etc. One morning when Grampa was 25 he ran into his future wifes house to tell his future mother-n-law something, saw Grandma at the top of the stairs, gasped and asked, “Where have you been all my life?” Her reply was,”Just waiting for you.”
Yeah, it really does happen.
Al