Bedtime Stories, which came out a few months ago, is not a very good movie. It gets kudos from me, however, for one little throwaway line I doubt many movie goers (especially the kids) even noticed.
In the movie, Adam Sandler plays Skeeter Bronson, a hamburger and pizza eating hotel handyman who is called upon in an emergency to take care of his sister’s two kids. (They’re the ones to whom he tells the magical bedtime stories.) His sister is a tightly wound elementary school teacher who feeds her kids only organic foods and refuses to give them any junk food whatsoever.
The first evening that Skeeter is alone with the kids, when they ask him to read them a story, he discovers that the only books they own are about organic farming and animal rights. That leads to the line I loved (and I’m quoting from memory, here, so forgive inaccuracies). As he tosses the books aside, Skeeter, the movie’s lovable hero, says, “I’m not going to read any of this Communist crap!”
I’d enjoyed the line when I heard it, and then promptly forgotten about it. That is, I forgot about it until Google Mail, noticing that I have a lot of political oriented mail, dropped a little ad bomb on me, directing me to the site that publishes Mama Voted for Obama!. This is the same place that wrote the memorable Why Mommy is a Democrat and Why Daddy is a Democrat. (What! You don’t remember those books?) You see, it seems that, with their Democratic dreams fulfilled, Mommy and Daddy now have to explain to the kids why Obama is in the White House.
Sample pages available on the website show why Mama voted for Obama. These sample pages indicate that most of the book simply rhymes about the fact that Mama voted for Obama in lieu of voting for various animals. For example, “She didn’t vote for a sly fox, or a blue ox or a cat named Socks. Mama voted for Obama.” In other words, it’s a rhyming book that just drums home the bottom line message: The woman that you, dear child, love most in the world, voted for Obama. ‘Nuff said.
Oh, except for that one sample page that in a few simple words and pictures likens McCain to a dinosaur, paints him as part of the party of negativity, and shows him hanging onto the wrong end of an elephant that, judging by the mouse with the broom, is spewing poop. Check it out. God alone knows what the non-sample pages have to say about bad, backwards Republicans and Obama, the king of the animal world.
Let me quote Skeeter: “I’m not going to read any of this Communist crap!”