Men who like big women
Bookworm on Sep 14 2011 at 9:29 am | Filed under: Uncategorized
In a skinny-obsessed society, it’s interesting to read about a woman whose love life has completely dried up now that she’s skinny. As a morbidly obese person, she attracted men who find big women, and women who eat, appealing. I would suspect her of just trying to get attention were it not for the fact that, way back in the 1970s, I knew a woman who had exactly the same experience: endless men when she was overweight, no men when she got skinny. Last I heard, some thirty-odd years ago, she was working to put that weight back on again.
De gustibus non est disputandum.
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6 Responses to “Men who like big women”
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It’s a genetic instinct for men to like women who have fat, as that is a sign she has enough food reserves to give birth and enough to produce milk to feed the babies.
Like all instincts, modern society can only suppress it for so long. And it never did have the 100% effect post modern Leftists said they could usher in.
At times women’s perceptions of men remind me of Poe’s “The Purloined Letter,” where a missing missive is in plain sight the whole time.
Men are all over the place when it comes to what strikes their fancies in a woman’s size, shape, color, figure. That means that there are plenty of men who find very thin women to be terribly attractive, or zaftig women to be very appealing. For every man who has a fixation on bodacious ta-tas, there is a man who finds a boyishly chested woman enticing. Yet most women don’t get that. They think all men have a cookie-cutter approach to what they find sexy. Not so.
I don’t know about any of this, and I’m not entirely sure I buy it. When younger it was a truism that the large girls always had the best personalities, but that was because they had to. It was their only weapon in the ongoing battle between – or maybe ‘of’ – the sexes. The hot ones didn’t have to bother being nice to people, so they often were not. The other thing that seemed common was that the hot ones required constant reassurance, thus always had at least one pretty large friend in their train, against whom they could constantly contrast themselves. An odd symbiotic relationship: the hot one kept the other one around to make sure everybody got it, someone to whom to compare themselves but with whom they did not need to be in competition; and the not-so-hot one got entree into many a gathering, party, event, what-have-you by virtue of a practically umbilical attachment to the hot one. Almost whatever you asked the hot one to, you just prepared for them both to be there.
When I was about fifteen my father passed on a minor piece of wisdom – which I in turn passed on to a couple of godsons. Put simply: always save a dance for the two or three fat girls standing alone on the edge of the dance floor. Do this at every dance, and talk to them nicely when you run into them around campus. Everybody will think you’re a good guy, you will have good conversations with them while dancing or whatever – and when she’s 29, and down to 115 pounds of gym-sculpted and toned toothsomeness to the point that you don’t even recognize her on first stare, she will have over a decade of fond memories of you. (They did, too! There was one who was, she told me, 205 lbs when I’d last seen her at 17 – a lot on a 5’2″ female frame. When I re-encountered her she was 32, still 5’2″ tall [though about 5'5" in the heels] – but 104 lbs. I followed those legs about two blocks in Manhattan before she started to laugh and turned around…[It's OK, Book, everybody was single.] )
But I never knew anyone who actually had a thing for morbidly obese women – or men either, for that matter. I think the race-memory theory only works up to a point, too. Two things about it: nobody among our far hunting-gathering or even nascent agricultural ancestors ever got enough to eat to allow for morbid obesity, it’s a relatively recent phenomenon; and if anybody ever did the rest of the tribe would see them as a burden, less able to work, less able to migrate, less able to bear burdens, less useful in general.
I suppose there’s something to it – for every piece of meat there’s a dog to haul it away – but I never observed it. I’m not sure I believe it’s at all common. As for the woman in England, some of this comes down to presentation. She’s no longer gross, now she’s just a schlump. She’s greatly improved, but she’s clueless about presenting it. Fix the hair, fix the clothes, fix the shoes, accessorize like she had a clue, teach her to use some makeup, and I bet the result would be different. She’s still presenting like she weighs 300 lbs. Some of this is in the mind, y’know.
It’s simpler than that: it’s a question of relativity. When she was a big girl, she was compared to the other big girls and found fetching, to those men who like big girls. Now that she’s thinner, she’s now going to be compared to the other girls her size and she’s been found wanting.
During the WW2-Big Band era a popular song was, “I Don’t Want Her, You Can Have Her, She’s Too Fat for Me” and another was, “My Lean Baby, She’s too Thin, Broomsticks Hide Her”. I agree somewhere in the middle and nice looking is the best!
Somewhat like the Patti Loveless pop country song of @ 15 years ago; “I’m not the Lady in Red, I’m not the Girl Next Door, But if Somewhere in the Middle is What You’re Looking For, Then I’m That Kind of Girl”.
jj said: She’s still presenting like she weighs 300 lbs. Some of this is in the mind, y’know.
I think ifconfig was right on point, too.
You’d have to check out her behavior and body signals in those arenas where she’s trying to attract a date. There are *so* many complexities that aren’t addressed here! Is she going to the same venues as before, or is she going to the trendy meat markets now that she ‘fits in’? Etc, etc.