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  1. Charles Martel says

    Dear Diary:

    10:30 a.m.  Roll out of bed and demand freshly brewed coffee.

    10:30:15 a.m.  Beat wife for being too slow to produce coffee.

    10:31 a.m.  Beat other wives just because.

    10:33 a.m.  Hear muzzein’s call to morning prayers. After beating one of the wives—can’t recall her name—to lay down prayer rug, implore Allah to kill all the Jews and set fire to the new school for girls that has opened down the street.

    10:34 a.m.  Tired from praying. Back to bed for awhile.

    10:36 a.m.  Hard to get back to sleep. Pissed off at Christian down the street who runs the restaurant. Up at 7 each morning—an hour before his competitors—trying to show up his fellow Arabs who are Muslim. Recruit a mob to burn him down? Rape his daughter?

    11:45 a.m.  Very rested after vivid dreams of fire and forced coitus. Wife waiting with coffee this time before I even have to ask for it.

    11:46 a.m.  Coffee not quite as fresh as I demand. Beat wife again. Worried that I may have broken her cheekbone permanently. If so, she is no longer attractive to me. Beat her a third time for making me beat her all those times before, thereby rendering her unfit for sex.

    11:51 a.m.  Head down to Christian Arab’s coffee shop to meet the guys.

    12: 10 p.m.  Hanging with the guys. Coffee slow to come; I start to say something. Think better of it after noting that server is over 6 feet tall and probably weighs 230 lbs. Decide to save frustration and apply it to fresh beating of wife number one when I return home.

    12:20 p.m.  Have been thinking hard about choice to beat wife. Have decided, after Allah whispers in my ear, to give first wife a rest and begin beating wife number two. On to something here? Pwerhaps start beating wives in sequence so all have chance to heal? Take tip from hateful Jooos and periodically rest the fields, so to speak?

    4:30 p.m.  Back from coffee with the guys. Tired. Down for a snooze. Will write later, Diary.

  2. says

    Doesn’t reflect well on the Israelis either. If the Israelis had a strategic ruthlessness on par with their individual performance, there would be no Palestinians in existence today. Their failure and weakness, is why the Israelis are suffering today. 

  3. says

    Charles:  Please remind me not to have liquids in my mouth when I start reading one of your comments.  I’m able to write this comment only because I spent a ridiculous amount of time swabbing tea off my screen and keyboard.  My Lord, was that funny!

  4. says

    http://www.mixedmartialarts.com/news/351209/Amateur-MMA-fighter-choked-out-left-to-die-in-Ohio-woods/

    This is one reason why I don’t recommend people use MMA as a way to thread the thin line between life and death. It’s no guarantee of survival and it’s no guarantee of avoiding jail either. This is for people who go into MMA thinking it will make them invincible. The story should be a cautionary tail, although the story in itself is not all that rare. Stuff like that happens all the time. 

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