And what’s the guy’s citizenship have to do with the price of tea in China?

You’ve already heard about the horrible Southwest flight, during which Ali Reza Shahsauri screamed in Arabic: “Allahu Akbar… you’re all going to die.”

Don’t worry, though.  We’ve just been assured that it’s not terrorism (although it certainly managed to instill terror).  Why isn’t it terrorism?  Because:

A spokesman said: ‘The FBI continues to investigate, but initial indications are that there was no terrorist intent. This guy is a U.S. citizen.’ (Emphasis mine.)

Well, that’s a relief!  He’s a U.S. citizen.  All of know that no U.S. citizens have ever been involved in terrorist acts against fellow Americans:

Timothy McVeigh, Oklahoma City bomber

Mohamed Osman Mohamud, (attempted) Portland bomber

John Walker Lindh, Taliban fighter & CIA killer

Nidal Malik Hasan, Fort Hood Killer

Anwar al-Awlaki, al Qaeda leader

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Comments

  1. ExAFCrewDog says

    Well, as long as the FB-freakin’-I sez, “Not to worry,” I’ll go to sleep tonight feeling very secure. Surely your examples can’t be an indication of how we aren’t to worry about any of those amongst us. Heavens to Betsy, those boys were just misunderstood. A bit outspoken and a tad overly zealous in their actions, maybe, but surely not a threat us Americans!

  2. SADIE says

    Lawyer to Ali: What did you say?
    Ali: I just said, God is great.
    Lawyer: Oh, so you were just asserting your first amendment right.
    Ali: Of course.
    Lawyer: What about the other comment, “you’re all going to die.”
    Ali: I didn’t say when.

  3. Charles Martel says

    When did the FBI turn into such a mob of wusses?
     
    When we clean house, I think we should just spare the Smithsonian, the galleries and the monuments, and burn the rest of Washington, DC down. (We’ll evacuate the workers and residents beforehand to Zuccotti Park.)
     
    Then salt the damned thing.
     
     

  4. Marica says

    Charles says: ”When we clean house, I think we should just spare the Smithsonian, the galleries and the monuments, and burn the rest of Washington, DC down. (We’ll evacuate the workers and residents beforehand to Zuccotti Park.)
     
    Then salt the damned thing.”

    You do realize that there is an alternative, right?  ’Cause over here on the extreme side, we just moved to a better place. 

  5. Spartacus says

    “Then salt the damned thing.”
     
    Well, bless my NaCl, *that* is salty language.
     
    I dunno, Martel.  The reason the Romans took the time plow under that other “delenda est” was because it was in freakin’ North Africa… chances of burying ag life there must have seemed pretty good.  But DC?  There’s been so much… um, fertilizer… swirling around that place for a couple centuries now that the soil must be some of the richest in the world.  Better to put it back into production as farmland, I think.  Then something useful might finally come from there; and elitist politicians whose sensibilities would be offended by working in a building between two cow pastures might reconsider applying for a job there, to the great benefit of us all.

  6. kali says

    Re: the Smithsonian.
     
    Save the collections, salt the curators to taste and send them to Spitsbergen (“Polar Bear Capital of the World!)
     
    “the Institution plans to reinterpret permanent exhibitions of the nation’s most unique and vital collections so that they appeal to, enfranchise, and inspire the broadest possible audiences.” 
     
    http://www.afa.org/media/enolagay/06-01.asp

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