I can see the future for Fairfax homeowners
Bookworm on Nov 02 2011 at 8:10 am | Filed under: Uncategorized
Humans produce waste. Not just bodily waste, but all kinds of garbage. Most of what we know about Stone Age cultures comes from examining their garbage piles. If Fairfax, California, has its way, though, archaeologists are not going to have an easy time of it if they’re scavenging Fairfax garbage in the distant future:
Fairfax residents would be encouraged to produce less garbage and likely face another increase in garbage collection rates in December or January if a new franchise agreement with Marin Sanitary Service is approved by the Town Council this week.
[snip]
The major difference between the proposed new agreement and the town’s previous 10-year contract with Marin Sanitary is that the new contract contains incentives to move the town closer to zero waste goals. The agreement requires Marin Sanitary to meet zero waste goals of 80 percent by the third year, 86 percent by the sixth year and 94 percent by the ninth year.
The agreement sets the goal of reducing use of 64-gallon cans to fewer than 100 residents and eliminating use of 96-gallon garbage cans by Dec. 1, 2016. The contract states, “If this goal is not achieved Marin Sanitary and the town will confer to evaluate options including imposing disincentive fees for 64 and 96 gallon containers.”
I’m all for reducing waste, up to a point. For example, when I realized I had no bird cages to line, I canceled my subscription to the San Francisco Chronicle. I also don’t like buying stuff very much, and the less you buy, the less you have to get rid of. But even I, a low-use consumer, manage to have a household that generates garbage — and when that garbage is generated, I want it outside of the house and gone within the week. Under these Fairfax proposal, though, it seems as if the garbage company, by contract, does not want you to place too much of your garbage outside, and it’s not going to take it away if you do.
I have a vision of the interior of Fairfax houses in the future as the homeowner’s struggle to comply with the new garbage requirements. Without professional help, it’s not a pretty one:
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9 Responses to “I can see the future for Fairfax homeowners”
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And I foresee a completely unexpected uptick in illegal dumping.
I really enjoy these little bits of California-ana you throw in from time to time. There’s just no getting away from it: California’s a hoot! It may be the most consistent place on the planet. Consistently insane, of course – but utterly reliable.
Hate to air our dirty laundry but anyone see this commercial for the Marin Zero Waste Museum?
I especially liked the THX1138 sound track, MacG…how appropriate! How California!
jj, we’re talking about Fairfax, a woodsy, laid-back town of 7,000 that one wag once dubbed, “Mayberry on acid.” It’s a weirdly classical American small town—Little League is fearsomely supported, there’s a great 4th of July parade, and the town’s layout invites bountiful schmoozing and socializing. If you don’t look too closely, it’s a vision of what the hippies thought they were creating in the Haight in 1967.
The fly in the ointment, of course, is the town’s absurd leftist politics. Usually the looniness is restricted to silly issues like support for homosexual marriage or empty gestures like pumping fists in the air on behalf of farces like OWS. Aside from such antics, most Fairfaxians lead lives free of much interference from the nanny state.
But these idiots will bring a whole lot of suffering down on themselves. Maybe that’s good. You can’t deny karma, and people who live in green, temperate-climed Mayberrys probably harbor secret guilt at their good fortune. Let them pay by living amongst heaps of ungathered honeydew rinds and unbleached coffee filters. Watching my moral superiors suffer is one torture I can bear.
These cats in the backyard are so cute. When they get scared of hearing the door opening, they go into hiding. Then 2 minutes later, the white streak fur one comes out, the lone brave vanguard, to see what’s going on outside. Then they creep crawl like some cat ninja to the food I put down, get a few bites, then look around. Reading cat body language is fun.
There’re smart folks in Fairfax; someone will start buying the jumbo vacuum storage bags for their garbage and pretty soon the whole town will be vacuum sealing waste of all kinds into neat stackable bags. The 5 pc vacuum storage bag combo pac is only $14.99 at Target.
Sorry Indigo Fairfaxians would never shop at a big box store. However the local hardware store could probably order them in for $30
Plus those vacuum-sealed garbage bags would probably make great housing insulation. Then the whole town can be literally made of garbage. Garbage is as garbage does.