The memo about Valerie Jarrett is EXACTLY how I see myself

The White House was apparently worried that Valerie Jarrett wasn’t getting the love she deserved, so it prepared a memo preparatory to Jarrett’s New York Times profile in 2012. just to make sure that everyone at the Times fully understood that, unlike Mary Poppins, Jarrett isn’t just practically perfect in every way, she’s actually perfect in every way. Mark Leibovich got a’hold of the draft memorandum, and shares it with the public in his upcoming book, The Town.

It’s really strange reading the draft memo because it is exactly how I see myself – and all of you, of course.  I can tell that you guys, much like Jarrett herself (and me, of course), can out-saint a saint.

WARNING:  Do not have liquids in your mouth as you read the following memorandum, or you will have to clean those liquids off your keyboard and screen:

The magic of Valerie is her intellect and her heart. She is an incredibly kind, caring and thoughtful person with a unique ability to pinpoint the voiceless and shine a light on them and the issues they and the President care about with the ultimate goal of making a difference in people’s lives.

Valerie is the perfect combination of smart, savvy and innovative.

Valerie has an enormous capacity for both empathy and sympathy. She balances the need to be patient and judicious with the desire to get things done and work as hard as possible for the American people from the White House.

To know what both drives Valerie Jarrett and why the President values her opinion so much, you benefit greatly from really getting to know the woman.

Valerie is tapped in to people’s experiences, their good times and bad. She knows from her own life what it is like to believe and strive for your dreams.

Valerie expects people to work their hearts out for the President and never forget where you work and the magnitude.

Single mother, woman working to the top in a competitive male dominated world, African, working for change from the grassroots to big business.

Valerie is someone here who other people inside the building know they can trust. (need examples.)

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  1. JKB says

    Wait, she’s African?

    What happened to the American part. Even a hyphenated American is better than not being American. I feel sad for her. Do you think she’s tapped into that? I mean, personally, not through NSA surveillance.

  2. Charles Martel says

    You gotta hand it to an African who can “pinpoint the voiceless and shine a light on them.” She would do well as a radar operator looking for stealth drones.

  3. Gringo says

    Wait, she’s African?
    From her looks, she is more Caucasian than African. Perhaps she is as much African in her genetic makeup as that infamous White Hispanic, George Zimmerman, who I believe is 1/8 African. :)
    I am reminded of what Claire Berlinski, a resident of Istanbul said about the current Turkish goverment, which went something like this.  She wrote that from Ataturk onward – not to mention the Ottoman government- Turkey has had authoritarian strains in its government. From this viewpoint, Ergodan’s current tear gassing and beating of peaceful demonstrators is fully within the tradition of Turkish government in the last 90 [or 900] years. But please don’t have the gall to inform us, Claire wrote,  that the current Turkish government is more democratic than its predecessors, that it respects the rights of citizens more than previous governments.
    Yes, I realize that Valerie Jarrett – whose former father in law worked with Frank Marshall Davis in a Communist front organization in Chicago in the 1940s- is a very powerful person. But please don’t tell me what a saint, what a wise person she is. After all, she had to be overruled in order for the operation against  Osama Bin Laden’s to go forward.
    For a similar reaction, I am reminded of taking the train from Boston to New York back in the 1980s. I overheard another passenger talking about Harvard Law students. They were so ethical, such outstanding persons, he said. Veritable salt of the earth. Had I been drinking anything, I would have sputtered. If they were such saints, why didn’t they enroll in the Divinity School ?

  4. jj says

    Sometimes all you can do is laugh.  Or vomit, I guess.  I think if anybody ever wrote anything that asinine about me – “the magic of jj…” – I’d be terminally humiliated.  You’d never hear from – or of – me again as I’d be spending the rest of my life not merely under the covers, but under the damn bed.  It’s rare that one encounters a rising tide – a tsunami – of tone-deafness as overwhelming as this one. 

  5. SADIE says

     What could I possibly add to “earpiece envy” and not turn Bookworm’s site into an X-rated stop. Nope, can’t think of a thing.
    “While a high-profile White House official—especially an African- American woman, such as Jarrett—could legitimately be considered a more likely target than most, several West Wing officials I spoke to were dubious there had been any special threats against her,” Leibovich writes. “They suspected, rather, that Jarrett asked the president to authorize a detail out of ‘earpiece envy.’ ‘The person Valerie felt threatened by was Axe,’ quipped one top aide.

  6. Spartacus says

    Wow.  Some WH intern has a well-worn, dog-eared copy of Filler Phrases for Eulogy Writers sitting on her desk.  It’s a creative twist, though, using it for someone who isn’t actually dead yet… credit where it’s due, I suppose.

  7. says

    Usually you have to be dead to be canonized as a saint. 
    Besides Ms. Jarrett’s African heritage, I thought she was also Middle Eastern (Iranian, IIRC).  Or was that another member of Mr. Obama’s inner circle?

  8. Gringo says

    March Hare
    Besides Ms. Jarrett’s African heritage, I thought she was also Middle Eastern (Iranian, IIRC).  Or was that another member of Mr. Obama’s inner circle?
    Valerie Jarrett was born in Iran of US citizens. Her father was an MD working in Iran in a development project.
    Regarding that making her Iranian, I am reminded of what Lord Wellington, the hero of Waterloo, said about being Irish because he was born in Dublin. “Being born in a stable does not make one a horse.”  :)

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