The plague of passwords

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Passwords may soon be obsolete, thanks to two-factor authentication.  Until then, please enjoy this joke that Earl forwarded to me:

Senior trying to set a password

WINDOWS: Please enter your new password.

USER: cabbage

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must be more than 8 characters.

USER: boiled cabbage

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain 1 numerical character.

USER: 1 boiled cabbage

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot have blank spaces.

USER: 50bloodyboiled cabbages

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password must contain at least one upper case character.

USER: 50BLOODYboiledcabbages

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot use more than one upper case character consecutively.

USER: 50BloodyBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDon’tGiveMeAccessNow!

WINDOWS: Sorry, the password cannot contain punctuation.

USER: ReallyPissedOff50BloodyBoiledCabbagesShovedUpYourAssIfYouDontGiveMeAccessNow

WINDOWS: Sorry, that password is already in use.

A refreshing break in the day

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Tired of stale old movies? Have your kids write a script (perhaps a door-to-door salesman theme), then have them record the dialogue and, lastly, have a couple of adults lip sync while acting out the dialog. “Charming” doesn’t begin to describe the result:

If you enjoy this kind of thing, you’ll find more here. Here’s another (possibly even funnier) one for good measure:

Just had to add one more, because Josh Groban (excuse me, Josh Gwobin) is a good sport:

Keanu therapy — and things that are even worse

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I’m having a “less than halfway through recovery” slump. I’ve taken a careful and, arguably, scientific approach to dealing with the slump: chocolate ice cream and repeated viewings of Keanu Reeves in Speed.

Keanu Reeves

I now know what it feels like to be an addict on a bender. I’ve clearly hit rock bottom.

I was going to remark rhetorically that the only question remaining is how much lower I can go for the next four months, but I think I already have my answer — I’ve now started watching Magnum, p.i. I’d be watching the Love Boat if it was on streaming Netflix. I’m clearly regressing.

The problem with online multiple choice questions

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Periodically, Facebook is suddenly flooded with multiple choice tests from Buzzfeed or Gawker or even a scientific outfit, all of them promising to tell which Disney princess you’d be; or if you’re an introvert or an extrovert; or if you have a specific regional accent; or if you should be reading War and Peace instead of Harry Potter.  I find all of these tests, whether silly or serious, useless.  They do not allow for any nuance or thinking outside of the box.

Apparently I’m not the only one who has problems with multiple choice tests that don’t reflect actual reality or, at the very least, my reality.  I’m just grateful that I’m not at a stage in life where stupid multiple choice tests affect my employment.  I also have one more reason to support my strong belief that I never want to go back to school — any school — again.  I’m a happy autodidact who doesn’t need to struggle with poorly drafted, ambiguous, stupidly conceived tests.