If you feel like your life is out of control — maybe it is

What happened today was entirely not my fault.  I’m only retelling it here because (a) it’s funny and (b) it’s a good reminder that no matter how well prepared we think we are, things happen.  To appreciate this story, you need to know a few things:  we have a home alarm; my wonderful cleaning ladies come twice a month at 9:00 a.m., like clockwork; and I go to the dojo when they come.

Oh, and you need to know that, twice a month, like clockwork, I make a big deal about the cleaning ladies.  They are not tidying ladies; they are cleaning ladies.  That means that, starting the Saturday before they come, I repeatedly remind everyone, “The cleaning ladies are coming.  You need to tidy things.” I’m still issuing these warnings the morning of the day they come:  “The cleaning ladies are coming.  Make sure you put everything away.”

Today, my husband was due to leave for work a few minutes after I left the house to go to the dojo.  I reminded him to tidy his stuff, because he doesn’t like to have the gals handle it.  While he was in the kitchen, I put on the kitchen table the rags, cleaning supplies, and check that I always leave for the gals.  I also unlocked the front door so that they could let themselves in and pointedly reminded my husband “Whatever you do, don’t lock the front door, ’cause the cleaning ladies are coming.”

My husband, bless his heart, didn’t lock the front door.  Instead, he left it unlocked and turned the alarm on when he left the house.  A subsequent call with my gal, long after the uproar ended, told me that all Hell broke loose when they entered the house.  They slogged on despite the noise, and I was lucky enough to come home to a scrubbed, dusted and vacuumed house.

Through it all, ADT did exactly what it was supposed to do:  it called me, repeatedly.  I never heard the phone ring.  Why?  Because my son, who had been using my iPhone to entertain himself while waiting for a tennis match, had turned the sound off.

Fortunately, except for the cleaning ladies having the living daylights scared out of them, it was no harm, no foul.  ADT did not call the police, because we’ve set it up so they call us first.  They were eventually able to reach my husband, who assured them that the home “breach” was authorized.  And I had a good workout, blithely unaware of the excitement at my home.

What happened shouldn’t have happened.  You can see, though, where I was entirely innocent here.  Sometimes, things just happen, and I’m only grateful that my local police weren’t dragged out to an unnecessary event (especially since that would have been unpleasant and embarrassing for the gals).