A slo-mo anti-mask rebellion

I’m not the fiery rebellious type but, today, we mounted a quiet mask rebellion and — hot damn! — it felt wonderful.

I live in the Southeastern corridor that’s been affected by the ransomware attack on Colonial Pipeline. And yes, I do think it was a real ransomware attack, not a Deep State trial run. However, I think the Deep State is sitting back and watching to see how it will work to deprive conservative red states of power.

Last night, at 11, we were at the corner Speedy gas station putting gas in the tank before there was any word of shortages, simply because I couldn’t bear to go to sleep without a full tank. This was the same spider-sense neuroticism that, last February, saw me go out and buy masks, hand sanitizer, bathroom cleaner, and toilet paper.

In case you’re wondering, I was not one of those crazy hoarders buying shopping carts and garages full of toilet paper. I just bought enough to get me through a short period of time. For the long hall, just in case, I also got a bidet attachment for my toilet. I think being raised by parents who saw WWII up close and personal left me with a very strong feeling that, once bad things start happening, you need to react fast.

All of this leads up to the fact that we went to the local Publix today to stock up on supplies. After all, if the gas shortage continues, the grocery store shelves will start being bare in about three or four days — and we were already running low on milk and eggs. We left the store with a week’s worth of food. As I saw it, the worst that could happen is that we won’t have to shop for a week.

I happen to like Publix. It’s very clean, the employees are polite and efficient, the products are good, the produce is nice, and the company is not a raving leftist company. If you check its corporate donations, they’re reasonable, with a slight conservative tilt. Because I like Publix, I had no intention of going in there and creating a ruckus.

However, we have had it with masks. We’re vaccinated (long story, won’t explain, rational choice for us) and we’re in a region with almost no COVID. We agreed that, while we would go into the store mask-free, if another customer or an employee politely asked us to mask up, we would politely acquiesce.

So we went in without masks and we stayed mask-free for our entire time in the store. There were a few other people without masks who smiled at us and we smiled back. It was wonderful. I never thought that I would enjoy the smell of a grocery store — but I did!

My current thinking is that masks will not end with some glorious Hollywood finale that sees everyone stripping off their masks and singing a song about liberty. Instead, I think it’s going to take incremental acts of rebellion. Maybe, after seeing us stroll down the aisle, smiling and free, others will slip their masks down, and then still others, until the masks are finally gone.

But gosh! I’d really love to have a Hollywood ending with a liberty dance. It makes me crazy that it’s the French who are doing it:

IMAGE: Rawpixel (modified).